The Knot
by anditsgonnabetotallyawesome
Summary: What Finnick's death should have been, not one line 'oh and he's dead' a full story.


A/N: The first 48 words are from Mockingjay.

I don't own HG, as much as I wish, yada yada yada.

/

There's a human cry from below. "Someone's still alive," I plead.

"No, Katniss. They're not coming," says Gale. "Only the mutts are." Unable to accept it, I shine the light from Cressida's gun down the shaft. Far below I can just make out Finnick, struggling to hang on.

"He's alive! I can still save him!" Gale tries to grab my arm, tries to stop me from descending back down the ladder, back to save Finnick. I wrench my arm from his grasp with a glare, and tear down the ladder.

I shoot the mutts surrounding him, ripping at his limbs, praying to any god, anything, anyone that he'll be okay. The few that had gotten through the Meat Grinder unscathed lay dead at my hands, their white scaly skin bloodied. I turn to Finnick, his body mutilated and ruined.

"Nononononono," My words run together and I'm shaking as I take in my best friend's dead body. "Please don't be dead, don't be dead!" The tears in my eyes brim and fall, washing his face from the gore.

And then: Life. His eyes creak open like a door that hasn't been opened in centuries. The bright green eyes that once glowed there have faded to a dull color. The happiness that once clouded his face has disappeared and is replaced with one of agony and pain, of torture and hurt.

"Katniss…" his voice rasps like a cat's hiss, no longer the familiar seductive purr.

"You're alive!" is all I can get out in the moment of ecstasy.

"Please…take it." The hand that is still attached to his body twitches as though he's trying to lift his arm but he can't. I uncurl his limp fingers to find a complicated knot.

"I can't…finish it." The words are broken and slow and he's choosing them carefully. I take the dirty, bloodstained rope and close his fingers.

"I will. I will finish it for you." I promise him, and he tries to speak again, his words slurring together.

"Tell…Annie…I love her." I nod, knowing that this could be the end.

"I promise."

"Goodbye, sister." His eyes close, his hand limp in my own. I pull his corpse to myself, hugging him and crying and saying his name over and over and over again.

"No, no, no, please, no!" My heart is literally wrenched in two as I stare into his glassy eyes. "My brother."

Suddenly, breaking through my grief, I hear a loud groaning of metal. Mutts come pouring through by the thousands, aiming towards me. I scream and hear Gale calling to me, calling me to come.

I get up, Finnick's body heavy in my arms. But when I reach the ladder, I realize something. I can't get up and carry him too. My mind reels and heart fights with it. I can't just leave him here! But if I don't go now, I'll die too.

A mutt grabs at my arm, tearing a gouge in my skin. I scream in pain and I drop Finnick.

"NO!" I shout as his body is dragged away through the mass of mutts.

"NO!" I shout as Gale carries me away from him.

"NO!" I cry as I am forced up another ladder out of the sewer into an apartment. There's a woman standing there. She starts to call to someone for help and for a second, I see a mutt in her eyes. That's when I shoot her.

I shudder, collapsing into a tiny ball on the ground. An innocent. I killed an innocent. That's what I mutter over and over, intercut with his name. At least, until a hovercraft drags me away, back to 13. Back to Coin and everyone there.

The first person who comes to my hospital bed is not Prim, or my mother, but Annie. When I see her, I burst into tears, and she is forced away from my side by a portly nurse. Of course, her leaving makes me cry even more, and I shake until finally everyone leaves.

Later that day, she comes back, and sits by my side until I stop crying. Her face is tear-stained too, but she has pulled herself together enough to face me.

"I miss him." She says, her voice breaking. Even she's not strong enough.

"Me too. He-he gave me this." I show her the knot, which I have refused to let leave my sight since he died.

She takes it, turning it over in her hand. Silent tears begin to fall as she examines it. It almost resembles a small beehive, every knot so meticulously done. Suddenly, my eyes catch something.

"Look, there." I point to a tiny white corner sticking out of the side. I tug on it and the whole knot comes loose. I gasp, and begin to cry uncontrollably.

"No, wait!" She says, pulling what I had yanked out of the beehive-knot out. "A note."

She reads it aloud:

_Hello, my darling Annie._

_If you are reading this, I am dead. Do not cry for me, don't waste your time trying to make up for my death, move on, and find someone else._

_Katniss, you are probably hearing this too. I'll always love you as a sister. Do you remember the time we first met? With the sugar cubes? That's my favorite memory of you._

_Annie, when I saw you that day in your wedding dress, I cried. You were so beautiful standing there. _

_I just wanted to say how happy I am to know both of you. I want to make sure you have a good memory of me, instead of some awful death or anything. Remember me, but don't dwell on the past._

_Love you both,_

_Finnick Odair_

I look up at Annie. She's sitting there, with her hands in her lap, head bowed, lost in some other world.

I take her hand, and squeeze it. "We won't forget him ever. Promise?"

She nods, unable to speak. We sit there, hand in hand, for hours, just silent, no words needed.

When enough time has passed—I don't know how much – we go our separate ways, her back to her room, and me, back to the hospital bed. And though he's gone, though he's left us physically, he'll live there forever in our hearts.

One day, long after that one, I take the rope, the one he gave me, and I stare at it. A new knot comes to mind, and I tie it. I work for days without end, no stopping, and no food is necessary.

When I finally stop, the knot resembles a sugar cube. I stare at it for a while, and pocket it. I'll never forget him, the sugar cube boy.


End file.
